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Friday, 16 June 2017

Wolf Perspective by Cooper


The real story of the three little pigs
One afternoon, I needed sugar for my cake for granny I decided to go round  the neighbourhood to see if anyone else had some sugar.
I walked to the first house the pig who lived here was fat and cranky. I think that's why he has made his house out of straw cause he tired and lazy got it. I stepped forward and knocked on the door it fell straight in I wasn't going to just walk into someone's house so I called out "Little pig , Little pig no one answered Suddenly , I felt something tingling on my nose then a great sneeze came out and I blew the house down then I saw a the big fat pig lying dead on the floor so I ate him what it was the only thing to do and plus I'm very hungry.
So I decided to keep moving to the fat pigs brother house his house was made out of silly sticks  again with the straw and the sticks just why? So I kept on walking this time I carefully knocked on the door and I looked away quite quickly because of the door then I slowly turned around the door  was still there I heard a response go away you best. I yelled out can you open the door maybe he replied ,again something made me let out a sneeze this one was awful and there he was dead  so I ate him too  you don't want spoilt dinner do you.
I walked to the next house this time I was positive I would get the sugar  I looked around and this house was made from dark red bricks "He must be the smart one in his family" I said to myself. I knocked on the door and there was a loud bang from inside I decided to climb up the chimney to have a look what it was and behind me was the cops  I ran fro my life to try and escape but they were too fast for me so I tried to trick them by hiding by a tree and waiting for them to find out that I tried to hide.
 But at the end they caught me I tried to explain explain but but like all criminals they didn't believe me.




6 comments:

  1. Hi, Cooper i think that your post i pretty good and i think that you maybe could have done is that maybe when the wolf sneezes and the pig ends up dead maybe that can not happen because it is kind of weird that the sneeze is so strong that it kills the pigs, Alex M

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  3. Hi Cooper, I loved your writing! It was very descriptive and made me feel like I was living a ‘Wolf's life’ for a moment. Your story was very realistic as a perspective for a Wolf and was able to hook me in.
    I loved your story and some of the best parts were the ending. The ending explained a lot and finished as if it was a introduction to a Sequel. Not only that but the ending used a very hook way of describing how the Wolf reacted to the moment. But next time you write an ending I suggest you try your best to add more punctuation and make sure you Proofread.
    After all the story was a very nice way to spend reading and the only way to make it better is, a, SEQUEL. So please Cooper could you make a Wolf’s perspective 2?
    Thanks, Jahvan. :)

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    1. Thank you Jahvan that was very generous of you to try and help me through my learning I will try change it if i can read it. THANK YOU!

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  4. Hi Cooper,
    I really like that you think that the wolf is innocent. But when you were saying about the red bricks you could of made them red and bold. Why do you think the wolf is innocent? From Divesh

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  5. Kia ora Cooper, I loved reading your writing. I think story is a great and your punctuation was definitely cool. Maybe next time, you could make it a happy ending for everyone to make your post a little bit more interesting for the little one if they read it. From Brayden

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